Questioner: Kirsty
I have a 3 year old son and a 7 year old daughter. My 3 year old has always had an issue with other children coming in to his space and would shout at them . Since starting pre school a year ago they have been having varying ammounts of problems with him. Since September they said his behaviour had been getting better but all of a sudden they say that whilst frequency is getting less the aggression is getting worse and they say he looks very angry when doing it – he often lashes out at the childrens faces and can leave scratch marks.
Pre school have said they do not know what to do to stop his behavour and that they feel it is now abnormal behaviour. They also say he can be really kind and sharing also . At home he used to be sometimes aggressive with his sister but this is very occasionally now and I would say no more that any other siblings as she can antagonise him also . He is not aggressive at all with me.
Occasionally he is agressive with other adults but this is often for a reason -eg – he kicks someons as they are about to leave – when asks why he`ll say becauce I want them to stay . As i do not have the same problems with him as pre school I am unsure what to do .
Dear Kirsty,
While I am sure that as a mother you are besides yourself, I also am reading here that your 3 year old is victimizing other children. I can’t help but wonder about the poor children that he has been getting aggressive with and how they feel about being the target of this 3 year olds agression?
Please do get to a specialist and find out what is going on with your 3 year old. While you may not have the same problems with him at home and he responds nicely to you, it is the other children that my heart goes out to as they do not seem to have anyone who is protecting them from his unacceptable behavior.
This child needs counseling now!
Best Wishes!
M Kay Keller